Posts Tagged ‘orthodox’

Lila Tov with Lila Toy

June 18, 2009

I know, it might be a little corny…but when trying to come up with my business’s name, it had to be hebrew, and it had to be cute. Those were my pre-requisites.  I had a lot of well meaning friends helping me, but the truth is, when you get it, you know it. After three weeks of batting around all kinds of possibly cleverer, more sophisticated, or just more fun names, Lila Toy was the one that stuck in “gut”.  While talking to my partner who lives in Israel, I went to say good night to her, in hebrew it is Lila Tov, and kidding around I said Lila Toy. What do you know, a NAME is born.

While laughing about this, I realized, isn’t that how we basically do everything that is important to us. How many months do we think of babies name, or what car we will buy, the home we will own? When you see it, hear it, taste it…you just KNOW.  It was most important to me to be PRO ZIONIST, pro Israeli, and totally and completely open and honest regarding sexuality amongst Orthodox women.  It has taken some time to build this relationship.  Countless emails to Rabbis, (some answered, most did not….) Sex Therapist that are themselves Orthodox, and honest talks with the women themselves.  The more I spoke to my clients of choice, assuming I would be teaching them more about my products, the safety factor, the pleasure factor…the more I learned.

What started out as a smart business niche, has changed my entire world.  Religion always was important to me. I grew up in a secular home where being Jewish was just what we were. It didn’t have a PLACE of its own…I was the only one who took it to heart. I placed an incredible amount of self in it.  I am fairly convinced that I came into this world as a card carrying zionist waving the Israeli flag.  What ended up happening while building these relationships is I have taken Religion to a whole new level within myself.  The teacher was TAUGHT. Now, not only do I have my client base that is growing daily, new friends who are wonderful, but I now have a deeper level of meaning and peace inside myself. How blessed I have been.

Meanwhile, back to what this short blog was about. A name is a name is a name. But for every soul out there, remember, much time and heart went into that name.  Respect the name, and the person. Within that respect you will have it come back ten fold.

There you have it. Why my business is called Night Toy, just with a hebrew slant.

Enjoy, be happy and Lila TOY to you all.

First Party

May 5, 2009

By now many of you know I have been working hard at getting my “DREAM” off the ground. A combination of a retail online site, with Judaism. What could be more natural than a SEXUAL site. A lovely area to shop for something to enhance your relationship with your partner. In focusing on the orthodox community, I have met some wonderful warm couples, and have been lucky enough to be open and learn. Not only about the sexual parts of their lives, but the absolute commitment that comes with Orthodoxy. The love that emanates from the families. While some see this as cliquish, I see it as tightly knit. The era, of when it took a village to raise a child, still exists in this community.  You can lean on your neighbor. You relate to your neighbor.  I started this to embark on a second income. Not a career, not a way of life. But, as I have continued my education, not only has it become a dream to make this a CAREER, but I realize the depth and energy that really does come from FAITH. I am thrilled to be part of it. Wish it hadn’t taken me so long.

Intimacy in the orthodox community

April 18, 2009

Forget everything you thought you knew. All the folklore, fallacies, and out and out lies. What “kosher sex” is really all about is love, passion and the knowledge that no matter what people think they know, is just that…what they THINK they know. The truth is, the Torah commands that the husband satisfies his wife. It is quite the opposite from the secular world, where men take it for granted that they are satisfied, so the sex must have been good. In the orthodox world, it is the female that is supposed to be guaranteed sexual satisfaction. Yes, there are some truths that we know. There is no sex during the females menses. The attendance of a mikvah at the end of her period. Wouldn’t it be lovely if we all partook in this beautiful ceremony once a month. The complete cleanliness of the mikvah. The pampering one receives from the woman running the bath. Not only is it a ceremonial bath, but it is a monthly manicure (of sorts) and Pedicure (again, of sorts) an exfoliation one could only try to emulate in the privacy of your own shower or bathtub. Also, and most importantly is the desire that two people have for one another after a mandated celibacy. The coming together at the end of this self imposed (yes, it is said, but how many people do you know that always do what is right?) denial of human desires? There is a beauty and the more I research this, the more sense it makes. We have all heard of absence makes the heart grow fonder….this absence occurs every month during child bearing years. I personally think it is a wonderful way to keep the romance alive and well. The excitement month after month of looking forward to making love with your life partner. Perhaps this is something the entire world can learn from. Instead of taking for granted, or having that “occasional” headache, we yearn to be with the one we love. Even after Fifteen years or more with the same partner. I have to admit…I am all for this!! With this, I end this wishing you all a Shabbat Tov and a Shavua Tov.

Orthodox lovin’

April 7, 2009

Its interesting, when I first decided to research the sexuality of Orthodox Jewish couples, my friends, and colleagues rolled their eyes, and asked what was there to learn? The amount of people who told me about the alleged hole in the sheet, sent me from mild amusement to wildly trying to get across that this “hole” is folk lore, and that the sex lives of couples, both secular and religous are ones of joy and intimacy. The Jewish religion is not the only religion who holds their sex life in such high esteem, but it is the one I know most of, and that holds my interest more than others. Perhaps it is because it is my religion, or perhaps it is because it is so misunderstood. This all started from going into business to sell marital aids to the orthodox community. A safe, discreet and “very female” shopping experience. Although, this is still very much what I wish to provide, I have now become so much more interested in the actual ways of Orthodox sexuality and Halacha. Perhaps this really was the way my path was supposed to take me.